The Best Quizzes for Couples Exploring Kink

If you and your partner are curious about exploring kink but aren’t sure where to begin, these two interactive tools offer a gentle, playful way to start the conversation. And they’re FREE!

Carnal Calibration is a free, online questionnaire that lets each of you anonymously answer a wide range of fantasies and preferences, from basic scenarios to more adventurous ones. They’re categorized by intensity (beginner, intermediate, advanced). At the end, the tool highlights where your interests overlap, sparking insight into mutual curiosity without having to awkwardly bring it up face-to-face.

The BDSM Test is a well-known online self-assessment that helps individuals explore where they fall along the spectrum of BDSM dynamics, like Dominant, Submissive, Switch, or Vanilla. It’s not a diagnosis, but rather a conversation starter: it helps people understand their own orientation toward power, sensation, and roles, which can be a powerful foundation for open, informed discussions with a partner.

This one isn’t specifically for couples, so you’ll each have to take the quiz, screenshot your results, and compare.

Why giving these a try together can be really useful:

• Low-pressure entry point: They let you explore desires and boundaries discreetly, easing into dialogues that might otherwise feel intimidating.

• Discover shared interests: Charting alignment in what intrigues you both can guide where to begin exploring together.

• Build language and comfort: Having a shared frame of reference makes it easier to talk about what turns you on, what you’re curious about, and what you want to say “no” to.

Think of these quizzes not as plans, but as fun, informal maps for conversation. Once areas of overlap or interest emerge, you’ll be better equipped to talk openly, set boundaries, and maybe even explore next steps with a coach!